Madly

Posted on July 24, 2010

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And I’m madly in love with you… 
Let what we do in here fill the streets out there. Let us dance for you.

Madly. This word has taken a new meaning to me this past week, and I’ll never read it the same.  Before, madly to me was term that applied to only serial killers or terrorists.  Now when I hear it, I connect it to deep passion, wholeheartedness, tangibility, and intensity. Yeah, that’s a little bit of a turn of thought.  I see it as more of a response. This mad-like picture I now concoct from the word can be traced to the streets of Hato del Yaque, twenty minutes south of Santiago.  There, I swelled up with the desire to become mad.

The thing about madness is that something has to be done with it.  Madness doesn’t go anywhere or prove anything unless it leaves the heart/mind of an individual, and people have a knack for wanting their madness known.  As I worked on the streets in Hato del Yaque I decided, more so affirmed, I was madly in love with God.  I kept kicking myself while I worked in the streets because I could profess my want to be madly in love with God, but yet not really do much with what I said.  Then, I came to a point where I wanted every instance to prove my madness, and consequentially bring glory to God.  This was tough though, because I had to get over myself and the things that I was holding onto.  Madness doesn’t work well if somebody is using their energies in multiple areas, it must be all-consuming and all-determining.  For me, the weight I was carrying around and attempting to deal with on my own prevented me from fully being madly in love with God.  Once I got past all of that, madness became tangible to me.  I had an overwhelming desire to display my madness, though I am nowhere close to fully attaining it, I sought to bring about God’s glory through each relationship and each project, that every moment may be of God, through God, and for God.

Now, being home, I’m ready to tackle this head on.  I want to live sacrificially, to put myself off and put on the True Love, who can handle things far better then I can, and whose love is far more powerful than mine.  I want what happens in my heart to be true, and not hidden by my own load of things I put on myself.  I don’t want to keep my madness to myself. And, I want it to look like dancing.

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